just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
