Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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