you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
3pm strippers are depressing
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Randomize
