FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize