you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
