so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize