going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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