Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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