I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
