so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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