Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
