Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
