i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
