so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
