Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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