is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
So many bounce houses so little time
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
