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• (210): View more from Texas

  so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....

  (512): View more from Texas

  oh shit that had to have been awkward

  (210): View more from Texas

  i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me

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• (212): View more from New York

  My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.

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• (707): View more from California

  I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?

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• (212): View more from New York

  last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'

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• (409): View more from Texas

  He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!

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