Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
