If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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