Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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