I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
