I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
