He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
