Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
