Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Ladies don't puke and tell
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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