i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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