I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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