There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
