judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Brb crying the tears of my youth
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
