I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Randomize
