Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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