Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
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