Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
