We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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