I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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