it wasn't lemon gatorade
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
