sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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