i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
