I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize