Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
