If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
