I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
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