i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
She announced her abortion via fbk
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
