doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
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