Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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