So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I think people are normalizing furries
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
