Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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