dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
