I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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