We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize