he puts the penis in happiness.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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