you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
